I know I've said my next album will be the last one but you must understand that I needed to make this one. After my social hibernation, I am slowly allowing myself to revert back to my old self and a part of that process is to recognize my feelings again. Since that terrible cheating/betrayal incident happened, I have shut down my feelings as a way of coping with the aftermath of the event and now that some time has passed, I deemed myself ready to be vulnerable again.
And feel I did! I was finally able to cry several times over the past few months. The trouble though was that I got so bogged down by all this baggage when I opened the floodgates of my heart that I felt that I had to channel my feelings somewhere. I had to do something cathartic for me to feel better. Then I remembered this shelved album idea I had been working on after Libertine and I recalled its theme and I did a bit of reflection and then it suddenly clicked on me that this will be the best time to make this album because I can finally relate to it. And here it is. Ready for you to experience.
At my age, there is this unspoken expectation that adults should be mature enough not to be too vocal about their romantic feelings. For a few years, I kinda agreed with that and that's why none of my recent mixtapes are overly emotional. It is only now that I am recognizing that bottling up your emotions is not very good for you in the long run and so I stopped listening to those thoughts and just allowed myself to feel this time. I allowed my heart to do the curating for this album and this is what it guided me to make. And it's very sad.
"In Limbo" is essentially a collection of electronic ballads. It's an interesting idea - juxtaposing melancholy with the harshness of electronic sounds. You might be skeptical about how these electronic songs can make you feel sorrow but you'd be surprised at how effective they actually are in expressing their intent. This is the reason why I chose these lonely astronaut pictures as my visual theme for this album. Astronauts are not known for being icons of emotion but those images included in the album art were able to paint them in a different light.
Can you imagine being lost in space? Cast adrift. Floating and floating. And then, say, somehow you reach Pluto still alive. And as you look at it, what do you see? Its heart. Of all the planets, it was Pluto, cold and neglected, which showed us that it has a heart.
Only time will tell how this album will fare compared to the others but personally, this album will always be one of my favorites. It's full of longing and explores different ways in which one can feel trapped romantically. The tones may subtly change from start to finish but my fave part is the ending because that's where the songs naturally build to a climax. The last song may surprise you because it reveals the true meaning behind the title and it may not be as obvious as what you think it is.
We're all expected to put on a strong front when we're with people all the time but at this age, we both know that sometimes all you need to get through the next day is a good sob on your pillow. This album is for those very moments. When you remember all that you've gone through and you take it all in. Floods of memories crashing down on you. All that pain. All that loss. And you allow yourself to finally grieve for every special person who is now gone from your life.
Tracklist:
01 Gong
02 Fool's Nest
03 Strangers
04 Half Awake
05 Unreal
06 Glory of the Night
07 Fool
08 All I Need
09 The Wall
10 A Little Lost
11 I Feel the Weight
12 Loveless Way
Download the album HERE.
I hope you'll have a poignant experience listening to it. Any feedback from you will be highly appreciated so please don't hesitate to tell me what you think about it.
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